I know I’m on the other side of the caregiving spectrum as someone who receives care, but I still relate to so much of this! The constant living in survival mode and the toll it takes on your body and brain is so hard to explain to people who haven’t experienced it.
As always, I love how you write about the struggles of caregiving in a way that doesn’t add to the guilt / burden that people who need care so often feel. Means a lot! 💙
Taking care of my dad was hard, but still one of the best experiences of my life that I will never regret. I got to become best friends with my dad again and we got to grieve my mom together -- he helped me just as much as I was helping him. I think if there was anything I would want people to take from my caregiving journey, its just how easy it is to fall into a health slippery slope. One thing leads to another which leads to another. No one, regardless of their current health, is exempt from it. Thanks for commenting Heather - love to hear from you!
Thank you for taking this out of the drafts! I found you while your account while you were caring for your Dad then two years later I became the caregiver for my parents while I had a newborn and I knew to turn to your account and highlights to feel less alone. This representation of the sandwich generation is so rare but so incredibly important and I'll forever be thankful that you and your sister have been so vulerable about it publicly. My mom passed from cancer in February and we're finally hitting a stride now living with my Dad who has dementia, even though there are so many variables, the brain fog is a little lighter most days and it has taught me how important it is to document the good times since these are our future best memories!!!
I'm so sorry for your loss. Thank you so much for h for sharing this. Even though I'm no longer caring for my dad, it helps to know others go through it too.
I'm glad this made it out of the drafts, Sarah! A beautiful essay that hit home for me – my mom died after a year-long battle with cancer in December 2019. While I wasn't caretaking as long or as intensely as you and your siblings were, I know the spacey, flakey feeling you describe so well. Life is hard, and it just keeps happening! It's great to see you happy on the other side – there's hope for us all!
Thanks for sharing this. I'm a social worker for a kidney transplant program, though I used to work in dialysis for many years. Caregiving in these spaces is so uniquely challenging and isn't well understood. There's a lot of work to be done in terms of resources and supports for caregivers in all areas, but in this area especially (in my opinion). Thanks again for sharing your experiences with everyone.
My Mother passed in 2019. I haven’t been the same since. I was a primary caregiver and worked full time in addition to the caregiving . Now it’s just me and my Dad. Praise The Lord Jesus he is healthy enough. My sisters live in other cities. I do my Dad’s laundry, provide meals, etc…. I’m trying to do right by him. Seek Jesus while He can be found . Tomorrow is never promised. Life as we know it/knew it is very short. Praise The Lord I was able to buy the grave next to my Mother’s.
Thank you for writing and sharing, Sarah. Your transparency around your experience caring for both your parents while also being a mom to a young child, and, young yourself was one of the first (only?) examples I’ve ever seen on the internet. It has provided me a lot of comfort as I’ve navigated being a major contributor to my mom’s care from initial signs of cognitive issues, all the way through to an early onset Alzheimer’s diagnosis (while grieving the entire situation & becoming a mom 3x over). My brain is permanently changed too. Sending love.
Oh I'm so sorry Christina. There is so much guilt associated with all aspects of caregiving -including caring for our kids. I think that was and is the hardest part of all of it. Did I do enough? Remember enough? Enjoy enough? It's haunting. Use your notes app or a journal and write down the everyday things with your kids. Or write down happy memories with your mom as they come up. I'm so glad I did that for my mom and dad. Whenever I miss them I pull up my notes app and smile /cry. But feels like I spent time with them.
Thank you so much for sharing this part of your life. We can feel the love that you and your family have for each other through all that you share. I love it when you share stuff like this just as much as all the shopping content 💕
Take care of yourself - you DESERVE the happiness you're feeling. You work very hard and have earned every second of sunshine on your soul! Trust it and enjoy! And please keep sharing - you never know who you're helping!
I know I’m on the other side of the caregiving spectrum as someone who receives care, but I still relate to so much of this! The constant living in survival mode and the toll it takes on your body and brain is so hard to explain to people who haven’t experienced it.
As always, I love how you write about the struggles of caregiving in a way that doesn’t add to the guilt / burden that people who need care so often feel. Means a lot! 💙
Taking care of my dad was hard, but still one of the best experiences of my life that I will never regret. I got to become best friends with my dad again and we got to grieve my mom together -- he helped me just as much as I was helping him. I think if there was anything I would want people to take from my caregiving journey, its just how easy it is to fall into a health slippery slope. One thing leads to another which leads to another. No one, regardless of their current health, is exempt from it. Thanks for commenting Heather - love to hear from you!
Thank you for taking this out of the drafts! I found you while your account while you were caring for your Dad then two years later I became the caregiver for my parents while I had a newborn and I knew to turn to your account and highlights to feel less alone. This representation of the sandwich generation is so rare but so incredibly important and I'll forever be thankful that you and your sister have been so vulerable about it publicly. My mom passed from cancer in February and we're finally hitting a stride now living with my Dad who has dementia, even though there are so many variables, the brain fog is a little lighter most days and it has taught me how important it is to document the good times since these are our future best memories!!!
I'm so sorry for your loss. Thank you so much for h for sharing this. Even though I'm no longer caring for my dad, it helps to know others go through it too.
I'm glad this made it out of the drafts, Sarah! A beautiful essay that hit home for me – my mom died after a year-long battle with cancer in December 2019. While I wasn't caretaking as long or as intensely as you and your siblings were, I know the spacey, flakey feeling you describe so well. Life is hard, and it just keeps happening! It's great to see you happy on the other side – there's hope for us all!
Thank you so much for your support, Allison. I am so sorry for your loss.
Thanks for sharing this. I'm a social worker for a kidney transplant program, though I used to work in dialysis for many years. Caregiving in these spaces is so uniquely challenging and isn't well understood. There's a lot of work to be done in terms of resources and supports for caregivers in all areas, but in this area especially (in my opinion). Thanks again for sharing your experiences with everyone.
Yes! It was his dialysis social worker who helped us find resources for us and him though. Forever grateful for dialysis social workers!
My Mother passed in 2019. I haven’t been the same since. I was a primary caregiver and worked full time in addition to the caregiving . Now it’s just me and my Dad. Praise The Lord Jesus he is healthy enough. My sisters live in other cities. I do my Dad’s laundry, provide meals, etc…. I’m trying to do right by him. Seek Jesus while He can be found . Tomorrow is never promised. Life as we know it/knew it is very short. Praise The Lord I was able to buy the grave next to my Mother’s.
Thank you for writing and sharing, Sarah. Your transparency around your experience caring for both your parents while also being a mom to a young child, and, young yourself was one of the first (only?) examples I’ve ever seen on the internet. It has provided me a lot of comfort as I’ve navigated being a major contributor to my mom’s care from initial signs of cognitive issues, all the way through to an early onset Alzheimer’s diagnosis (while grieving the entire situation & becoming a mom 3x over). My brain is permanently changed too. Sending love.
Oh I'm so sorry Christina. There is so much guilt associated with all aspects of caregiving -including caring for our kids. I think that was and is the hardest part of all of it. Did I do enough? Remember enough? Enjoy enough? It's haunting. Use your notes app or a journal and write down the everyday things with your kids. Or write down happy memories with your mom as they come up. I'm so glad I did that for my mom and dad. Whenever I miss them I pull up my notes app and smile /cry. But feels like I spent time with them.
I’m so glad you decided to hit publish on this draft. It’s beautifully written. Thank you for sharing it with us.
Thank you so much for sharing this part of your life. We can feel the love that you and your family have for each other through all that you share. I love it when you share stuff like this just as much as all the shopping content 💕
Take care of yourself - you DESERVE the happiness you're feeling. You work very hard and have earned every second of sunshine on your soul! Trust it and enjoy! And please keep sharing - you never know who you're helping!
Thank you for sharing this, Sarah!!!
Sarah, I loved this essay. Your vulnerability is perhaps your biggest strength. And you have LOTS of strengths! Thank you so much fun sharing this.
Thank you for writing and sharing your story ❤️